Sikkim III

After almost 2 months of inactivity here, I finally get myself to write something. And I guess the best thing right now would be to complete the Sikkim travelogue. I know it is too late to blog about it but just for the sake of keeping an account of the empyrean peregrination , it is a task worth taking up right now.

Continued from Sikkim II

Friday/Saturday
After previewing the pics of the trip on Thursday night , everyone agreed to one thing.
Over the years, of all the places that had undergone scrutiny to qualify for the perfect honeymoon abode , this one was certainly somewhere at the top. The feeling of being totally cut off from the rest of the world , being constantly guarded by the behemoth conifer-covered mountains , and cool weather in the surreal landscape definitely did something to the pheromones.
With these thoughts in our minds, we went off to our beds only to be awoken early morning by a breathless friend imploring us to leave our warm beds and have a look at the scene outside the window.It turned out that because of the dark and rain last night we were quite oblivious to the fact that the place where we were staying had snow covered mountains all around. Since we were not very high up altitude-wise, the snow from the mountains was misting up as the sun rays fell upon the snow. The scene was surreal becuase as the sun rose up , we were watching the dark shadows on the mountains being replaced by the light. An imaginary line separating the dark and sunlit area was moving ahead as we watched blissfully , the glory of nature , darkness giving way to light. To one of the more religious friend of the lot, it felt like the arrival of God on Earth unveiling himself and suffusing everything with light. Although I am not used to wake up early in the morning , this morning would certainly go down as one of the best early mornings I have managed.












Breakfast call from the guide, brought us back from the 'neverland' like state.
The plan for the day was charted out on the breakfast table. We would be moving on to the top of the Yumthang valley and then on the way back pay a visit to the Yumthang hot spring.
The rain last night was a sure sign that we would find a lot of snow at the top. A 4 wheel drive Sumo was arranged to ensure we reach the top without much trouble.We had a light breakfast to stay out of trouble on way.

As far as I remember it took us around 1 hour through the curvaceous roads to reach a point where all the 2 wheel drive vehicles had given up as a result of knee deep snow. On the way we were witness to some mindblowing picturesque scenery , prompting the digicams into action.





















We were quite happy that the guide had arranged for a 4 wheel drive , and every 2 wheel drive vehicle that we left behind made us even more proud of the acuity of our guide. But these blithe moments were shortlived as, not many curves up a number of 4 wheel drive cars had also given up. The knee deep snow was making it impossible for the vehicles to move forward. On snowy roads it is the first vehicle that has to apply the maximum power. The trail left by its tyres ensures that the following cars do not have much trouble cruising through. But the point where all the cars had stopped had a huge deep blanket of snow as far as we could see. It was also rumoured that there is a blizzard a few kms ahead and it is not safe to move further up.
We were obviously quite dissapointed . We were 11 kms from the destination and there was just no way we were going to reach there on foot without some sort of help from locals. And all we could see there were Indian and foreign tourists. So we started doing what all the others were doing . Throwing snow balls at each other. But after about 2 minutes it all seemed so inane . I mean playing in the snow was cool but then after spending so much time in the snow , we still had not seen any of the famed "points" that were in the plan initially.
We decided to move on.
Atleast till a point when we can clearly see the blizzard and then we would make a U turn.
The cauldron of youth was bubbling with enthusiasm and nothing, not even a blizzard , was going to stop what we had decided.
Any adult would surmise that at that point we crossed the line that divides courage and foolishness.
I dont know if that was right on his part , but seeing our enthusiasm, even the guide decided that if that is what everyone wants we can take a chance. And taking the guide with us was probably the sanest decision that day.

So we started , eight of us , quite oblivious of what we would go through in the next few
hours.As we walked through we left behind about 10 vehicles of tourists and our water bottles.

Both these facts were realised after we were about 2 kms uphill , and the latter was the one which we were more concerned about. Obviously we were not going to get any taps or handpumps on the way. And strange as it may sound , as soon these realisations dawned on us everyone started feeling thirsty. All we had with us was a sea of snow blinding us with its brightness.
But there was no going back from here now. The thrill of being at the top in the next or the next or the next hour was enough for us to keep moving. The more enthusiastic ones were moving at the front , making fresh boot marks on the snow covered road as they moved , making it easier for the lesser fit ones to move ahead. The more concerned of the lot kept behind with the lesser fit ones just to be together on this perilious meandering. The snow was knee deep when we started and as we moved on, it became even more difficult to move fast. Breathing became a strenous job. But stopping in between was no option now, not because we were still as enthusiastic as we were when we had started, but because stopping now meant getting separated from the ones who were ahead. Another reason was that as long as we kept moving we did not feel much pain , but whenever we stopped to take breath , the legs started aching and we started feeling the exertion. A light breakfast in the early morning was also not helping us much right now. But we kept moving . We had no choice . Or so we thought.

When around 6 kms were left we met a vehicle with tourists inside coming down hill. The guide stopped the vehicle and talked in the vernacular with the driver.He enquired about the situation at the top. And the answer he got was quite grim. It was snowing quite heavily at the top and there was only a miniscule chance , that we were going to get something to eat up there. This gave a jolt to the zeal of a few. The guide said that now either we can go back from here or move on for two more kms to a shortcut till the Yumthang hot spring. Though we were staggering a bit but still we decided that we move further up. The snow was getting in our head. Quite literally, now that it had started snowing lightly. The breeze was also getting unfriendly.
After about half an hour of further toil we reached the point where there supposedly was a shortcut to the Yumthang spring. But all we saw there was snow. We were still 4 kms from the destination but we had no clue where we were actually headed. The guide had. After looking at the clouds approaching us from one direction he surmised that the weather was going to worsen in the next few hours and there was no point now going further up. One or two members revolted and said that it was foolish to return after coming so close( as if it was not foolish enough already).
After about 10 minutes of brusque discussion it was decided that the group is going to go together wherever we went. Eventually it transpired (with a little help from the warning of the guide that he will leave us at this point and go no further) that we started moving down.
We had thought that going down would be easier than coming up. It could have been, if we were not as thirsty and hungry as we were then. The beguiling breeze was also now taking its toll on us. The weather was definitely getting worse as it was getting darker and snowing harder.
To make matters worse, the trail that we had left behind was fast getting covered by fresh snow
making it dangerous to walk in the knee deep snow. Intuition , bridges, trees and milestones were the only things that were guiding us now to stay on the road , and not move on to the sides that looked almost at the same level. A wrong step there could mean going down as if you are in a quagmire. Thankfully there were enough trees on the way to help us through.
But there was another problem now. We were really very very thirsty , toiling hard now for almost 3 hours. So we did the next obvious thing. We ate snow, knowing very well that it will lower the body temperature and could be dangerous , but we had to do that. All i remember now is that it did not help much and within a few seconds the throat was as dry as before.
At this point we were separated into two groups. Three guys including the guide were ahead of us. The rest stayed together about half a km behind. Now that it could have been a question of life , reaching back anyhow was more important than anything else. One group went ahead to make sure that the Sumo does not return back before we reach it. One thing that we did not stop doing even in those moments was making full use of the digicams.
When about 5 kms were left , the snow at the sides was deep enough to cover the milestones completely. Although on the road, the snow was melting at the places where the group ahead of us had kept their feet. The sumo coming downhill had also left quite a deep track clear of snow , and even for the fresh snow it was taking time to cover it up.


At this point we had started lying to the chubby guy in the group whenever he asked the distance to be covered. If it was 5 kms we told him 4 and so on. We were cracking PJs to lighten
up...calculating probailities of reaching back alive with detailed clauses and conditions. We talked
of helicopters coming to rescue us. We talked of impending avalanches on the way, which almost became a reality when we encountered snow coming down rapidly from a 70degree elevated mountain. Only the snow balls were not big enough till then.
As far as we could see it was all white . The river that we had left behind on our right had turned into a brook. For a while I thought of the movie Vertical Limit. Although the whole exercise was strenous , I was enjoying in some way thinking of making a snow trekking trip some day if we reach back alive. And all this time it was snowing incessantly. After walking for another 1 hour , we heard the honking of the horn of the Sumo round a corner. Immediately all the tired feets sprang into action and we ran towards the vehicles.
The place that we had left with more than 10 vehicles and 50 odd tourists was now covered with even more snow and just one vehicle inching forward. The driver had almost decided to leave when the first group reached the vehicle.
We made it back , satiating ourselves with everything edible in the vehicle. Never had water tasted so sweet.
Finally we moved downhill at the optimum speed.

We reached back to our hotel room totally enervated and slept like there was no tomorrow, only to wake up for dinner. Played cards for a while and then slept again.

The next day was quite uneventful as compared to this. We moved down
to Gangtok on way meeting Ninzi again when we stopped for lunch.This time she was ready to go to shcool.
Here the guide also showed us his tattoo of an ant which symbolises hard work in the region.





Once in Gangtok we visited a few places in the city.

Rumtek Monastery is worth mentioning here.
Situated at about 20 kms from Gangtok, it is a beautiful peaceful monastery covering a much larger space than Enchey Monastery that we had covered already. It was prayer time when we reached there , and we spent a few minutes inside the monastery. The sound of the gong still reverberates through me when I recall it.

But the high point of the trip was the visit to Yumthang valley.
After almost 4 hours of rigourous toil we made a very adventurous trip. We walked almost 15 kms in those 4 hours braving apathetic cold weather, spine chilling cold wind that made breathing an exertion, hunger , thirst and impending threats of blizzard and avalanches. And we were still alive. The feeling was awesome. Foolish but awesome. And if someone tells me that we will return alive after another such trip , I might give a serious thought to do all this again.

The guide had said that he had never seen such a group before , and although he had been in trekking trips before , he would never forget this one ever. And he would never forget our group.
We shared his feelings completely.

Song -- Aadat(Jal)

Elizabethtown... You never quit!!

Life is a great leveller . And so is, preparation for CAT. A very humbling experience.
You might be scoring profusely one day , and then on one not so bright morning you might mess up badly bruising your ego, shattering your hopes , sending you into a state of temporary depression. You might be winning stages but you are not crowned until the race is over. And that uncertainity is what makes it even more challenging and requires preparing for it even more persistently.
Had an English test 3 days back in CL; scored highest. Then a DI test yesterday;messed up big time. Came back to room.Analysed the test.
Listened to Chevelle's hard rock for 2 hours (the band rocks, by the way!!) that sent me off to slumber land for the next 8 hours.
I felt refreshed , waking up in the morning, listening to U2's Beautiful Day.
Surprisingly everything felt really pleasant. It was raining heavily after a long time, and the smell of the earth was so totally invigorating especially after the previous day's bloodshed :P.
And suddenly I felt like writing something on the blog. I had had some thoughts all this time , but I was not getting in the mood to write.
But now here I am. And I would write about something I had been postponing for a long time now.
Elizabethtown.

It is a movie by Cameron Crowe. The same director who is better known for his movies Jerry Maguire , Almost Famous and Vanilla Sky.
Elizabethtown, a movie that did not go well down with critics, and it's comparison with the previous ones by Crowe resulted in it getting lambasted severely by certain critics. But if you take my word , do not believe critics until you watch it yourself. They did it to a movie like "City of Angels", and they can do it to any other perfectly entertaining movie. Although my views too would be biased as now I am completely captivated by the simplicity and beauty of the movie , but if there is one movie that I would always suggest to my friends it would be, Elizabethtown.
Some people have compared it with Garden State which is on a similar theme , but apart from the fact that Natlie Portman is cuter than Kirten Dunst, I do not think there is anything of much significance to compare. They are totally different movies. Garden State is better edited but I like Elizabethtown more.

Picture this, a brilliant young guy hired by a national scholarship program to one of the topmost designing(shoe) company in the US worked 8 years day and night for a pioneering shoe design which is launched amidst great fanfare but is outrightly and outrageously rejected by the world.
The company suffers huge losses amounting to 972 million dollars!! Sounds farfetched ? But its a movie and you get the idea. The guy breaks down due to this huge failure ..he calls it a fiasco.
Everything is over for him.
Ready to commit suicide he must be thinking if it could get any worse.
And then, he gets a phone call. His dad died. The same day. Since he is the responsible one in his house he has to take care of his funeral back where his dad was born.
Postponing his suicide he moves on to the place ... Elizabethtown. On the flight he meets a rather queer flight attendant Claire(Kirsten). And from here the story takes a turn. But it is not a romantic story , so do not expect a run-of-the-mill mush filled movie. How the guy , Drew comes to terms with his father's death, his relationship with his own family and his father's family and friends , with Claire and also his own life can be felt as you flow with the movie.
It is hard to actually define the genre of the movie. It is comic with undercurrents of tragedy, it is about the friendship of Drew and Claire with undertones of their almost romance.It is about death as well as about life imbued with spirit. It is about the salvation of Drew's mother coming to terms with her husband's demise in her own zany but lovely way. And it is also about a lot of other things.
Cameron Crowe's love for music is visible(audible!!) in the awesome soundtrack of the movie. You have Elton John's My Father's Gun and Lynrd Skynrd's Free Bird and you also have the lesser know artists Ulrich Schnauss and Hellen Stellar.Songs that usually go unheard of, are intertwined with the more famous ones with elegance.
And for all those who love going on long road trips alone or otherwise , with just them and their music , they would surely love a certain part of the movie where Drew goes on for a 42 hour roadtrip.
If you are not a movie critic and if you are not really into hard rock(:P) , I am sure you would like the movie. And you might also go on to love this movie if you realise that Cameron Crowe is completely in love with his charaters. So if some day you find a CD of the movie do bring it home.It would be worth it.
The most important lesson (the movie is not preachy , btw) that you get from the movie is that whatever be the situation, you never give up hope. There is always a lot that you might be missing out in life , and there is always a better day in line if you just believe.

I am sure cynics would say these are the kinds of things that happen so predictably in movies. So just to give some more substance to my conclusion I would write a bit more about someone else , someone who is more close to reality.... Lance Armstrong.
I just finished his biography, It's not about the bike.
For the uninitiated , Lance is a retired American professional road racing cyclist who is now known for his incredible feat of winning the Tour de France , the most prestigious bicycle race in the world, for 7 consecutive times. And this after he fought back with testicular cancer which almost took his life. You might think this is the stuff what heroic folk/fairy tales are made of , but just have a glimpse of a part of his book here and you would realise, as he recollects his experience with brain and testicular surgery and extensive chemotherapy which was nothing short of horrific , that heroic feats are achieved in real life too just by believing honestly and completely. In the book he says(during his treatment) ,

But I knew this much: I believed in belief, for its own shining sake. To believe in the face of utter hopelessness, every article of evidence to the contrary, to ignore apparent catastrophe— what other choice was there? We do it every day, I realized. We are so much stronger than we imagine, and belief is one of the most valiant and long-lived human characteristics. To believe, when all along we humans know that nothing can cure the briefness of this life, that there is no remedy for our basic mortality, that is a form of bravery.
To continue believing in yourself, believing in the doctors, believing in the treatment, believing in whatever I chose to believe in, that was the most important thing, I decided. It had to be.
Without belief, we would be left with nothing but an overwhelming doom, every single day. And it will beat you. I didn't fully see, until the cancer, how we fight every day against the creeping negatives of the world, how we struggle daily against the slow lapping of cynicism. Dispiritedness and disappointment, these were the real perils of life, not some sudden illness or cataclysmic millennium doomsday. I knew now why people fear cancer: because it is a slow and inevitable death, it is the very definition of cynicism and loss of spirit. So, I believed.

And if it comes from someone who was in the worst stage of cancer, you better believe him. After he miraculously recovered his doctors told him that his chance of recovery was not 50%,20% or 10% but 3 %.
My respect for Lance went up by notches. A lot of credit goes to his positivism which he inherited from his mother who always believed in him and her phrase "You never quit"which he remembers in every race and which eventually became the truth and motto of his life. And also to his wife , who was there for him helping him to recuperate and come to terms with life post cancer treatment.
Though I was a bit taken aback to know that his marriage crashed when although he had described how much he loved his wife. There was no mention of their breakup as the book was published much before their divorce. But my doubts of his hypocrisy were washed away when I saw an interview of his wife after divorce, and also read an article she wrote. After reading the book and her views in her article , I gather that although they still love each other and their kids , they had made a mistake so common today... Marriage is not a compromise. If it is, it is bound to fail or be the cause of unnecessary anguish. But I do not want to delve into all this right now.

I would rather end with what prompted me to start. Refreshing simplicity.
I came along this video of the song "First day of my life" by Bright Eyes. It is a decent song but the video is too sweet and it eventually makes up for the vocalist Conor Oberst's cracky whiney voice.

It is the simplicity of the video that draws attention.
And if you like the song then do visit here for a cover of the song by a girl. She has a very good voice.I like it more than the original song.

Now while finishing off I feel it is high time I complete my sikkim travelogue just for memories sake. It has been due for a long time now.Well will do it soon, hopefully. :)

Song - For The Widows In Paradise; For The Fatherless In Ypsilanti (Sufjan Stevens)

Iris

Spent the last week at home. It was like a visit to a resort with me cooling off and dozing in the cool cool ambience of my room for most part of the day, and watching the world cup matches for most part of the night. Add to this the regular supply of good food courtesy Mom the great, for a week, and I am quite a refreshed and satisfied person.
The stay at home was pretty peaceful and gratifying, except for one incident. And I am not counting arm-wrsetling with bro and cousin as an appalling or violent event.
It happened when we were watching the television and the remote was undergoing all kinds of sturdiness tests , as it moved swiftly from my bro's hand to my cousin's and then finally into mine, when we finally settled on Channel V playing a song of some band I had not heard of. The next song that played , had a very familiar sound to it though I did not instantly recognize it.
My cousin jumped in to prevent me from moving on to another channel, by saying it is a very good NEW song.
It took me just a few more seconds to realise what I was listening to. And almost at the same moment the titles appeared ... Iris - Ronan Keating.

WTH!!

No mention of Cover song or anything , just Iris - Ronan Keating.
Soumabh had warned me of this, before I was leaving for home but it had slipped from my mind.

It felt so bad. It was such an insult to the original song by Goo Goo Dolls.
And the stupid video made it all the more abhorrent. Seemed more like a tourism advertisement for Dubai.

If there can be something called extreme euphemism , then here is a very good example of it --
I do not appreciate this at all Mr. Ronan Keating! You have ruined it.

This led me to read more about cover songs.

Wiki tells me
Popular musicians may play covers as a tribute to the original performer or group, to win audiences who like to hear a familiar song, or to increase their chance of success by using a proven hit or to gain credibility by its comparison with the original song. Covering material is an important method in learning various styles of music. Bands may also perform covers for the simple pleasure of playing a familiar song.

But, when the bands come up with a cover version then atleast they should acknowledge the original artists/bands by mentioning their name in their version.
Otherwise, for a newbie to the music world it is sheer deceit.
Like, I came to know that the song "Baby can I hold you tonight" is actually by Tracy Chapman and not an original Boyzone creation. And it was quite a shocking revelation.

There have been cover songs which end up better than the original ones but most of the ones I have listened to have unfailingly mentioned "Cover" with the song title, so that it is left on the music lovers to decide whichever version they like more.
Apart from that a cover song is a very good way of paying homage to the artist/song by contemporising and keeping the song alive for years, as once you listen to the cover version it is almost imminent that you would like to hear the original version too.
But if you do not mention "Cover", then I think it is nothing short of plagiarism. A sin. A disparagement to the artist and the art.

Picture this, an artist making a painting of the Taj Mahal and selling it as an original creation of the imagination, in Timbaktu or some such hypothetical place where people have their general knowledge levels tending to zilch, so much so that the only thing that comes in their mind on hearing the word India(forget Taj Mahal) is Food or Football. You just cannot do that. You have to tell them about the Taj Mahal. You have to give the due credits to the Taj.

Ok I know that was a ridiculous example, but it is something like using 99% of the text of LOTR and publishing a new book , without mentioning John Ronald Reuel Tolkien anywhere in the book , and then winning accolades from less informed public(who have never heard of LOTR).

Damn! Weird examples!
But you get the point.

I am not very sure of the legalities involved but there must be some kind of copyright laws that can be bypassed or something, or else there would have been a few thousand people including Johnny Rzeznik's lawyer suing Ronan.

Anyways. Just to cool off tempers , I am finally posting the original song Iris by Goo Goo Dolls!(Thanks to Youtube.com).


Goo Goo Dolls , Iris


Lyrics -- Iris


And how much I wish I was here
Goo Goo Dolls Live in Manchester,UK




or here
Goo goo dolls - Iris(Live concert,Stockholm)



Awesome!! The people must have had a heavenly time at these concerts.
Whew !!
God bless Johnny!!

Random fact : John stopped drinking when he was 24 and concentrated on his music thereon when he realised he did not want to ruin his life by sliding into the abyss of addiction. That was November 5th 1989. The day I turned 5 years old.
And that makes me feel good! :D

Johnny Rzeznik is a demigod

Have you ever had a time in your life when you find it extremely difficult to tell or share what is going on in your mind, with anyone. It could be something too personal or it may be because you are afraid it might hurt someone else.
Something you know people would not understand right now , because that is not normal.... that is not something that happens in the regular life .
And when I say you cannot tell anyone .. i mean ANYONE. Not your parents , best friends , brothers , sisters , girlfriends, boyfriends ..whatever.

What do you do if you find yourself in such a situation .... and please (for God's sake) don't think suicide as an answer. It is stupid. Too depressing ..... life is too beautiful to be wasted on any (and I really mean any) issue.

Remember this is a time when you don't want sympathy or even empathy.

Something similar was(/is?) happening with me. And this is what I have to say.

Music helps a lot. And I've been reading a lot lately on the internet ranging from blogs to business to movies to anything I can get hold of. Watching movies was another option to which I resorted to sometimes. I have kept myself busy some or the other way.

Is it really going to help ??
I think in some way it does help.
Right now, to quote someone , I am just going with the flow.

I search for some answers and I ask life to give me some clues and to guide me.
And what I am seeing happening around and with me, makes me wonder what life is showing to me.

I read some article and , you can call it a coincidence, somehow I find something which helps me to hold ground.
I watch a movie , and there is the actor saying something which suddenly hits me hard, as that seems exactly what the doctor ordered.
I put the winamp on random play mode and the song it plays aptly describes the situation I am in.

I picked up CLs PDP brochure and I read ...

You will face questions that will change your life , forever.
&
You will feel compelled to come with answers you never imagined you knew.

They were in an altogether different context but because of the state of mind I was in, it did make me laugh and wonder.
Now this is a very strange thing. There have been some situations in my life earlier when I had asked for some sign, some clue, something to help me take the right decision, God/life has responded to me in strange ways.
It is not that I am superstitious , and in normal circumstances I do not care about such things.
But I like to experiment sometimes and in those times I become receptive to such signals. Sometimes they don't lead to any significant consequence.
But sometimes they have been dead accurate.

Like, before leaving for Noida,when I was wishing something had not happened, I was watching(finally!!) Lord of the Rings, with a friend. And then there is this time in the movie when Frodo says,

' I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened. ',
to which Gandalf's voice replies
' So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work in this world Frodo...'

And suddenly everything starts to settle down.

Before leaving for Noida , I said Lets see what life has to show me next .... and what I had gone through there tells me this is a transition phase in my life, if not a totally life altering experience. A short stint in industry(btw am back) for a project helped me to realize what I actually do not want to do and the way things should not be done. Then meeting with old friends made me realize how things are being done and what is happening.
Finally after meeting new friends and then spending sometime alone, it dawns on me what I should be doing. Or may be what I wish I should be doing , cuz there is always the string of hope which we have to hold on to.

And like always I do not want to talk about how people in the corporate world mistrust each other and justify themselves by blaming it on each other, and how managers forget that people working at a lower/subordinate postion in the organisation, are working with them and not under them. And how important the work culture in an organisation is, notwithstanding the amount of money involved.

Similarly I do not want to talk about the things people do under peer pressure, losing their self with every passing day, and how things that were wrong in their books when they were young , gradually become the only right things to do.

And I also do not want to talk about the apathetic political state of the country and how they manage to perpetuate the blame game and so easily cause rift among the masses.

For some time go through some of the links that I came across in the past few days.
Sinnerman throws some questions at life itself &
then a tale of self belief and seeing meaning in coincidence.

And now I want to talk about Johnny Rzeznik today.
John Rzeznik is the vocalist/guitarist of the band Goo Goo Dolls.
John Rzeznik is the person who wrote and sung Iris.
And I like him probably because he is one of the ideal punks.
Or probably coz he came up with Iris beating a bout of writers block.
Although I do not like all the songs of the band, there are some songs (including Iris) which when start playing , make it extremely difficult for me to switch on to some other song.
First the music , then the lyrics and then simultaneously both start growing on you.
And you just can't let it go.
And they keep me engaged when that is what i require.

And somehow they strengthen my beliefs. Of free thought, individualism and self belief.
Thanks to my parents, a good education was my only concern in the early years. Apart from taking care of some distractions that could have affected my studies, I was allowed to think freely and without prejudices. Fortunately(or unfortunately) I have managed my thought process to not be influenced heavily by any external factor until now. Now that even includes(on certain issues) my parents.
That is one of the reasons why I completely fail to understand the need of classification of society in any form, if just not to create an order for administrative reasons. But because of the petty complexes that people promptly develop , the only purpose it ends up serving is further division and ego clashes.
Now I am digressing a bit from what i was writing , but since these thoughts are coming in my mind , let them have their way.

I was never interested in religious ceremonies so i thought I was turning into a non-believer.
But since I believed in God and liked to go to some temples sometimes for a sense of peace, I did not belong to the ideology of atheism. But I got the same sense of peace in a few mosques, gurdwaras, churchs and monastries I visited. That meant it was more of the peace than faith that drove me to religious places.
Then on religion based division ( and just dont get me started on caste based division) I will quote a friend, who by the way is a bit romanticist at heart. He once wrote,

The first instance I remember communal thoughts came to my mind, was when in school I read "Hindu, muslim, sikh, isai, apas mein sab bhai bhai". I was forced to look and find the difference between the four communities. And with age bhai bhai is gone, the four commuities live.

Though different people have different beliefs , but this statement ... it makes you think that probably rather than following what one believes , people are forced to believe what others think that they should believe. Just because they were born in a particular family. And the destiny gets decided there and then as people believe blindly what they ought to believe and it goes on and on.

I thought I dont believe in any faith. But then I would not have found peace listening to Piya haji Ali from the movie Fiza. And then similarly, I could not be moved by Ek Onkar from RDB as much as I am moved by the aarti mom sings sometimes.
It makes me think do i belong to one faith or do i belong to all of them.
Or do i belong to none.
Perhaps I believe in all faiths.
Or perhaps it is just the music.

Is religion a way to liberate the soul and open our minds or is it another inflexible tool to limit the domain of spirit.

In the small part of my ephemeral life that I have lived , the only purpose of religion that I have figured out, is to make people more disciplined , and have faith in themselves, more than anything else. For any other purpose , it is better to follow no faith because a sense of belonging to anything makes you feel that your beliefs are the best.
And it is human weakness/tendency to feel the need of proving this to others , which ultimately leads to further rift and actually serves no purpose of developing an individual's personality, which to me is the purpose of life itself.

I was ruminating over my convictions, when I started the post and I end up writing about something else ( though, it is also a part of my beliefs), which I did not plan to write about, initially.

But all this is what I believe and as Rzeznik says,

What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway

hence I better shut up now. Rather than proving things to others let me do things I believe in, my way.

But since I have a knack of recalling situations whenever I listen to the same song, I would never be able to forget my present state, which oscillates between a beautiful vulnerable melancholy that never crosses over to gloom, and a sense of bliss that is full of hope and conviction.
And life.


"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself" - Friedrich Nietzsche

It's over to you

And I didn't think about
All the ways I hurt you and myself
And I wouldn't say a thing to you
I keep it to myself in
My mind
And I can't stand without you
And I won't find the answers
When you're gone
But it's over to you
I can't find the answer when you're gone
And it's over to you
But you can't find the answer where you are
And you know I need you now
And this ain't easy to admit
But no one needs to know
What goes on behind
The door in my room
I'm kicking through the
Walls in my mind
And I can't stand without you
And I won't find the answers
When you're gone
But it's over to you
I can't find the answer when you're gone
And it's over to you
You can't find the answer where you are
I won't tear you down
I won't tear you down
To get into the world you wanted
I'm kicking through the walls
But no one can believe
In things that never change
But it's over to you
I can't find the answer when you're gone
And it's over to you
You can't find the answers where you are
And it's over to you
I can't find the answer when you're gone
And it's over to you
You can' find the answer where you are

-Goo Goo Dolls

OMG!!

Ok. Long time back I had lost complete interest in the country's politics mostly because I never had faith in the politicians and also because I was shocked at the apathy of certain politicians.

The current reservation issue, and the attitude of the government makes me despise politics even more fervidly.
But when I read Arjun's Singh's interview by Mr. Karan Thapar, you would never know what words were coming to my mind (until ofcourse you read it and start feeling the same).
The way he dodged statistics and facts was hilarious and shocking at the same time. Hilarious, because ......how could he say what he said ..... and shocking for the same reason.
There is no room for transparency ..... every issue that can be talked about is "under consideration".
Arguments based on statistics are "fallicious".
People's protests on the streets is a "hyped" up thing.


I am really very impressed by Mr. Karan Thapar's patience and persistence.
Any other person would have had a lot of difficulty maintaining his/her composure in that situation.


From where I see, a divided Indian society is all set to make space for a violent divided society full of mistrust and hatred.



Cloudy Now (Blackfield)

My epiphany... ??

This semester has shown me things, I never thought I would see.
This semester has made me realize some facts of life, that I thought I was better off without.
Ten days back a friend here commited suicide. It was a shock.
And it took me some time to come out of it.
He was the kind of guy with whom you stand for a minute, and you are sure to be laughing on some or the other witty comment. He made the most serious discussion turn into a laugh riot. I would never be able to forget his laughter.
It was least expected from him.

The things that followed the demise vexed me more. Suicide would never be justifiable in my books but the attitude of some of the people was despicable and apathetic. At the same time I have started to respect some others for their concern and strength.

Part of my anger is towards him as well.

Never should any factor in life become big enough so much that it influences your personal life in the negative direction, and in absence of a vent mechanism you find it easier to end everything rather than starting again with vigour.
If you switch on light in a dark room , it would not matter for how long it was dark, before you decided to fill it with light.
And it takes only you to bring change for the better and to hold on , when it is required the most.

But all these are just words, and they seem meaningless right now.
Wish he had just allowed himself some more time to come out of ‘that’ state of consciousness.

I am fine now. It took me and my friends some time to calm ourselves.
Will have to keep moving.

Right now , I am leaving for a project in Noida.
I had wished for a change of location….. to go home. Seems like God is taking care of the wish in parts.
Lets see what life has to show me next.


Where do I begin (Beth Orton)

Sikkim - II

April marks the beginning of the end of the final semester with friends. It also marks the beginning of the deadlines of submissions of all term papers and projects .
But somehow right now I am in a good mood.

So here I go again.


Wednesday/Thursday

Not sure of when we would be feeling like having a shower (from the local people we came to know that North Sikkim is having heavy snow fall and it would be quite cold up there) , everyone took turns to bathe.
With all our bags packed we reached the tour operator's office [A number of tour operators are available in the main market in Gangtok who arrange for taxis for 1,2,3 or 4 day tours for different places from Gangtok. Gangtok acts as the centre point in the sense that , from there you can take a taxi either to East,West or North Sikkim , but you have to return to Gangtok to travel from one of these places to the other. Gangtok of course is in South Sikkim . One can also directly talk to a taxi driver and then move on to different places. Bargaining is common and sometimes necessary. Once the deal is finalised , they obtain the permits for the places near the border and from there on everything is taken care by the driver or by the guide arranged by the tour operator. The guide would now arrange for fooding , lodging at the places where one would be staying for the duration. We had a 3 night 4 day package.] , dumped our bags in his office and went off for breakfast.
Since it happened to be Holi that day , by the time we returned , we could see colours in the air.
Unlike Kanpur or any other place in UP, Delhi etc. people were not running and throwing colours at us. Tourists were quite at peace as people formed groups and played among themselves. Some foreign tourists though decided to enjoy the colours.

The trip was charted out in the following way. We would start from Gangtok to Chungthang to Lachen and after a night stay move on to Gurudongmar Lake next morning. Then we would come to Lachung (not Lachen !!! It took us about a day to get familiar with these names) via Chungthang for a night stay and then move on next morn to Yumthang Valley and Yumthang hot spring. Chungthang was a place in between which acted as a fork in the map. Plus we were promised mind blowing scenic beauty throughout our journey by our seniors who had been to this place.

Our guide was kinda cool and adventurous guy who talked a lot and kept us entertained throughout our trip. Thankfully, later on he turned out to be a guy saner than a bunch of college madcaps.

The journey began. With a flat tyre. The driver replaced it with the spare one. But since we were already on our way we would have to wait for some time to get set the punctured tyre right.

Our first stop was the Seven Sisters Fall .
The water made 7 cascades due to the natural arrangement of the boulders before making the final plunge to the ground, and hence the name. From the point , however only 3 such small water falls could be seen. Jumping and dancing from one rock to another each one of us tried to reach as close to the fall as possible. In that operation , I slipped and fell straight on the rock in front of me. Ooooh .. it really did hurt. I did not get the time to bring my hand between the rocks and my ribs.



In that moment I thought exactly two things.
First , this would be the end of the trip, if not life.
Second, somebody should take my photograph. I wanted to capture that moment. And this weird thought made me feel like laughing , but the pain suppressed the feeling. I could not get myself even to smile. The only thing I managed was to cough and try to get myself to breathe. I actually also thought that, may be there is some internal damage to my lungs and that I would cough out some blood soon ( vivid imagination!!) . And I felt all this before friends could gather around me to see if I fractured a bone. Nothing of that happened though. I kept feeling pain through out the journey , but the natural beauty I witnessed helped me bear the pain. Thank God the trip did not come to a boring end there.




We moved on enjoying the surroundings.


The Teesta river.










Our next stop was some 20kms before Chungthang , where we had lunch and clicked some pics of cute girls.









Ninzi. Ain't she sweet.













A lot of distance needed to be covered so we moved on. Only to find another flat tyre on our way.
With no spare tyre left we were stranded alone.It was like some kind of force was trying to stop us. Little did it know we were quite oblivious of it completely mesmerised by our surroundings.
While the guide managed another spare tyre from one of the taxis passing by , we were busy having our talk with nature.


The clouds that were making the guide a bit tense , made us more excited as it increased our chance of finding snow as we moved up.




Once in North Sikkim , your only mode of communication is the Army. You get completely cut off from the rest of the world and this feeling is really amazing.

It was already dark by the time we reached Lachen. And it had started raining quite heavily.
By the time we started to settle in the lodge the guide sent us to , the guide came back to us telling that the food that he brought from Gangtok was in the Sumo whose spare tyre we were using and that inplace of stopping at Lachen , the Sumo driver took the car to Thangu (14000 ft) , and he asked us if we wish to stay back here or move further up. That meant another tiring 30 kms journey but after he mentioned the immense possibility of snow in Thangu , it took us about a second to reach a unanimous decision. Including me just two of us had seen snow before , and none of us had seen snowfall ever before.

Very soon we realised that the decision was infact quite stupid (:D), what with rain & fog making the treacherous mountain road even more perilous. And the fact that there was no light except for the headlights of the Sumo made it even more adventurous. Add to this the frequent sighting of neon signs reading " Sliding Zone , shooting zone " etc. , and you would get an idea how thrilling it was for us. And yes how can we forget that we did not have any spare tyre , if by any chance we have a flat tyre. We swore that if we reach home alive we would not tell our parents about this, lest they ground us for the next time. After about an hour we saw the first snow flakes falling on the windshield.
Immediately 5 hands stretched out to feel the snow. From there on the the road became more slippery but we were pretty overwhelmed to feel anything but excitement, like a bunch of kids who tasted chocolate for the first time.

We stepped on the snow in Thangu at about 8 pm. Our stay was just near the army camp. There was no provision for lights at such altitudes. I could see the snow covered mountains surrounding us, but the cold and hunger told me to just stay near the cooking place for need of warmth. The locals used battery operated lights at night. Believe me, it was extremely cold. The beds were so darn cold that they actually seemed wet. A round of Antakshari kept us busy , till dinner was being prepared. Boiled food was served. Boiled potatoes and rice seemed quite gratifying, although we had to ignore the taste.
Back in our rooms, cold beds were there to welcome us again. Tired of the long and exhausting journey , we slept hoping the cloth that we stuffed in the huge gap in the window doesnt come off or else we wont see the next day morn.

The next morning we woke up to this.

I have never ever had a brighter morning. Everything was so bright that after some time my eyes were strained. Completely mesmerized by what we were watching we finally concluded that it was a good decision to move up from Lachen. Hot water was arranged for us to wash up. It was quite cold and later on we came to know that at night the temperature was around -7 C. The batteries of 2 digicams had stopped working. And we forgot to switch to the bright snow mode in the other two.

We padded up ourselves with boots we got on rent. Had our breakfast .....bread and maggi!!

The snow fall continued. And we were stuck in the snow. We tried to persuade our guide to take us up to Gurudongmar lake, but the driver obviously did not find the idea amusing enough to entertain. With about 2 feet snow covering the road probably it was not a good idea anyways. The army was to start cleaning up the road only after the snow fall ceases , though there were no such signs.

With nothing better to do , everyone started playing with snow. Snow balls started flying in air. After about half an hour of vicious warfare and a bruised nose , the guide said that now it is time to decide if we want to move down or wait for the snow to stop.

We decided to have a talk with the army men regarding this. They told us that probably this is not the right time to move up/down as the snow was beginning to melt and the road would be slippery.

With this he added that we should not move around without goggles as the brightness of the snow might blind us! Ouch! After spending 2 hrs in the snow without goggles we come to know this. Immediately goggles were bought and after some serious intellectual discussion it was decided that after waiting for another hour it would be best to move down to see newer places , now that we cant go up to Gurudongmar lake.

After another round of photosession(with the newly bought goggles), we moved down.

While moving down and clicking pics , a thought came to my mind. Would Switzerland be any better than this place?

The whole day went off in covering the large distance from Lachen to Lachung , but yeah we were kept engaged by the astonishing natural beauty of North sikkim.

We reached Lachung in the evening , and like before , ran for the bed , exhausted by the tiring journey. Only this time we woke up in time for dinner. Lachung , unlike Thangu, had proper electricity and water facilities. So we played cards and sang songs to make our presence felt in the lodge we stayed in before we hit the bed again.

Little did we know what was up for us the next day.

To be continued .......

Song : Change (Tracy Chapman)

Sikkim - I

"The X ray is not very clear beta but I think there is a discontinuity(???) here....... although I am a bit doubtful ( The sheer casualness of the statement almost made me laugh ) , I think you should get this checked with an orthopaedist. I am referring you to Dr. XYZ ........"

Pain in my ribcage led me to go to the extensively dreaded but free health centre. And as a result of the above I had to leave for home to find out the truth in the above set of statements.The fall had a serious impact on my body ...quite literally , but until now I had felt the pain was relatively bearable.

Been home now , I am fine and the discontinuity thing turned out to be a false alarm.

More on the fall sometime later.

But first , the trip.

Sunday night/ Monday
We boarded the train(which eventually got 24 hrs late due to some accident or probably due to some bomb scare) at about 12:30 am before which I discussed hindi novels with a friend for an hour as we had to wait for the train. Discussion may not be the right word here because most of the time he was speaking(I have never read any hindi novel) and I was making weird comments here and there in between . He told me about the novels of famous writers specially Sharatchandra chaterjee (if I remember the name correctly) and told me how they brought forth the emotions of women during the time when malpractices like Sati were prevalent in India. Then the discussion veered off to relationships and girls. I usually hate waiting for trains but discussions like these make the wait desirable, enriching and in any case it is a good way to kill time as long as I enjoy the discussion.
One thing that hit me was the feeling that it is so easy to dispense advice when you are not the person actually facing the problem. But sometimes , not facing the problem gives you an edge over the person having the problem , as you would not see things the way he/she does , completely unattached emotionally , though the empathy factor helps to keep the passion at the same level. What we discussed was too personal for him, to be quoted here, but the conclusion will not hurt as it was mostly about lost opportunities, a rather common phenomenon. As the train approached the CNB platform no 7, we hastily concluded that if you lose your first chance it is fine , but if you lose your second one than you have no one to blame but yourself, which ofcourse cannot be put to any practical use other than a bad example may be. Consider yourself lucky if you get a third chance which by all means would be a far fetched hope even though you would be a lot more mature to handle the situation this time. And that sometimes it is fine to give in to your instincts.

Philosophy which usually does not make any sense.

A 23 hr long journey meant that we had a lot of time to sleep , read , sleep , play cards, sleep , saunter around in the compartment or stand on the entrance and see the fields fly past and then sleep again. I managed to complete Abhijit Bhaduri's Mediocre but Arrogant(MBA). It was boring in the start, but with nothing better to do , I sticked to it and it made a decent finish. The book is about a man in a B school (XLRI) and how he deals with things that life throws at him.
The book reminded me of Chetan Bhagat's Five point someone , but I feel this is better than FPS. Might be people in management schools disagree with me and feel the same way for MBA as I felt for FPS. May be the discussion with my friend about relationships led me to feel more involved with the book. For me , it was more of a read-it-while-you-are-travelling-and-you-might-like-it kinda book.

The train journey was mostly peaceful , except for an hour when
our group started singing all kinds of hindi numbers, from movies ranging from Anand to Raja babu. The jamming session ended only
when the TTE threatened to throw us out of the compartment on
the request of the till then unassuming and innocent passengers
and when a lawyer among the passengers warned us of filing a lawsuit
to cause mental trauma.

Fortunately for the passengers , we got down at New Jalpaiguri at midnight.

The platform was a clear contrast to the one in Kanpur.
Atleast at 1:30 at night it looked cleaner.
The main entrance of the station is connected by a long covered bridge
which can also qualify for a platform for its sheer width.


Tuesday

We hired a taxi from NJP to Gangtok(Gangtok has no rail or air connection to the city) early in the morning. The driver maintained a high speed(much to our distress) and ensured that we reach there in about 3 hrs with adequate stops for tea and to get our heads and stomach in place.
Once in Gangtok it was decided that we would freshen up in a hotel room and move on for a 4 day 3 night trip to North Sikkim next day.
With one whole day for Gangtok , we decided to give ourselves some rest , instead of taking tours that were offered to visit a number of tourist spots in and around Gangtok.

But later that day we decided to explore the city ourselves on foot , after taking the required maps and information from the Sikkim tourism centre in the main MG market.
Following are some pics we took while we meandered on the roads of Gangtok.
(Ignore the date stamp..it should be actually 14/03/2006)

A Kodak Moment!!!

Flower exhibition has flowers . :P










After a long long walk on the curvaceous
mountain road we finally reach Enchey Monastery.

We had Maggi here !! Prepared in typical
Sikkim style.

These cylindrical drums are a commonality in the monastries. It is said that when you rotate them in a specific direction you are absolved of all your sins. Whatever is written on the drums means Dharma.

Cute little monks!!

We came back to our hotel room in the evening exhausted from walking more than 10-12 kms when we had initially thought of having some rest. So this time without another thought everyone dashed to their beds , only to wake up in the midnight to realise that we had skipped our dinner and there was not a single shop open in the market. How much we missed our canteen!!! Disheartened and hungry we watched the highlights of SA-Aus cricket match and slept again.

To be continued .......

(A quiz and another deadline forces me to stop right here. Will be back soon)

Song : Only You (AR Rehman - Vande Mataram)